A Strange Creation
by Karu Leonnese
Summary: A couple of FFVI characters join with VII guests to create a monster. A challenge on the FF forum board.


setzeroth .Comic-Sans48 { pont-family: Comic Sans MS; pont-size: 48px; } .Comic-Sans18 { pont-family: Comic Sans MS; pont-size: 18px; } .Comic-Sans16 { pont-family: Comic Sans MS; pont-size: 16px; } .Helvetica13 { pont-family: Arial, Helvetica, adobe-helvetica, Arial Narrow; pont-size: 13px; } 

Here's Setzeroth!!

*Enter onto a horror movie-esque scene. Serenity, Sabin, Edgar and Kirie, all dressed in white lab coats, are surrounding a human-looking figure under a cloth on a table.*

IT'S ALIVE!! IT IS ALIIIIIIIIIVE!!!!!!!!!

*pokes the limp figure* Uh, Serry...it doesn't look to alive to me...

*shrugs* Maybe it's just...resting.

What exactly is our purpose for this again?

*groans* I __told you, Maca-Roni. I figure, if Sephy can make a weirdo, science-fair project of a mother, then __we can do it too. 

Only we're doing something even better than raising parents from the dead.

Which would be...?

*the two girls look at each other and smile*

A SETZEROTH!!

What the hell is a Setzeroth??

It's a mix between Setzer and Sephiroth.

Duh...

Okay...so why isn't it moving?

I think I know why.

Why??

I forgot to put the brain in.

*wrinkles up her nose* Eddy, go get us a brain out of the jar on the counter please.

You keep brains in jars?

Actually, this isn't our lab. It's Sephy's.

And that explains everything! *goes to get a jarred brain*

Who's gonna put the brain in?

Yeah. Not even you know brain surgery, Ser.

*shrugs and smiles* How hard could it be?

*o.O*

Kidding...I got someone to do it for us.

*carrying in a brain in a jar* Who?

*The door opens. In steps a man wearing a lab coat and a surgeon's mask, so his face is hidden. Everyone but Serenity looks frightened.*

W...who's that...?

*smiles at the masked man* Aw, cut it out! You're scaring them!

Sorry. *he takes off the mask, to reveal none other than...*

VINCENT??!!

Yuppers. *grabs Vincent's arm* I asked him if he'd help, and he said he'd put the brain in for us.

*shrugs* I get to operate on someone that looks like Sephiroth. How could I refuse. Besides, she asked so nicely.

*whispers to Serenity* He looks like a vampire...

*whispers back* So? So did Setzer when I first met him...

*taps the jar* Hellloooo...Guy holding a brain here...

I think what my brother means to say is: Can we get this over with?

Sure. *points to Edgar* What's-your-name. Fish that brain outta there and hand it to me.

*looks sick* You want me to __touch it?!

*rolls his eyes* No, I want you to move it with your mind.....Is that possible for you?

No.

Oh. Okay then. Just pull it out of the jar, and let's get to work.

*tries to get the brain out of the jar, but spills it. The brain bounces on the floor like a quarter-machine super ball.*

*Everyone scrambles around to catch it, running into each other, the lab supplies, walls, etc... Finally, Kirie catches the thing, and Vincent puts it in the creation.*

Now what??

*hands Sabin a pair of those electrical cords that you charge dead car batteries with* We zap him to life!

*attaches one of the clip things to the creature, and hands Vincent the other one* Put that on the little generator thing over there please.

*hooks the other side to the electrical generator and is immediately fried* AAAAAHHHH!!!!! *a charred Vincent walks over to Sabin* You..did..that..on..purpose..

*aloud* Why, whatever do you mean? *to Vincent* Stay away from my girlfriend, you vampire.

*stands behind a row of levers* Everybody get back! I'm juicin' it up!

*Everyone puts on their safety goggles*

*flips the generator on. The electricity surges through the cords into the Setzeroth creature. Kirie turns the generator off*

Did it work??

*The Setzeroth twitches. It sits up all Frakenstein-ish and looks at the group* Mama!!

*o.O!!!*

*bursts in through the door* What in the hell are you people doing in my lab??!! *looks at Vincent* And what's __he doing here?!

*enters the room half-asleep* What's wrong with you people? I'm tryin' to SLEEP here...

*turns to Sephiroth and Setzer* Mama!! Daddy!!

*O.O!!!* Daddy?!

*O.O!!!* Mama?!

*laughs nervously* Surprise.

We made a little something in your lab.

It's called a Setzeroth. Part Setzer, part Sephiroth.

And I believe it thinks you're it's dad, Setzer.

*chuckles* And it thinks Sephiroth's it's mother!

*jumps off the table and starts chasing Setzer and Sephiroth* MAMA!! DADDY!!!

What in the name of 7-Flush??!!

Mama, save me!!

*The Setzeroth chases Setz and Sephy out of the room, as the others laugh away*

  


  


  


*Enter onto a horror movie-esque scene. Serenity, Sabin, Edgar and Kirie, all dressed in white lab coats, are surrounding a human-looking figure under a cloth on a table.*

IT'S ALIVE!! IT IS ALIIIIIIIIIVE!!!!!!!!!

*pokes the limp figure* Uh, Serry...it doesn't look to alive to me...

*shrugs* Maybe it's just...resting.

What exactly is our purpose for this again?

*groans* I __told you, Maca-Roni. I figure, if Sephy can make a weirdo, science-fair project of a mother, then __we can do it too. 

Only we're doing something even better than raising parents from the dead.

Which would be...?

*the two girls look at each other and smile*

A SETZEROTH!!

What the hell is a Setzeroth??

It's a mix between Setzer and Sephiroth.

Duh...

Okay...so why isn't it moving?

I think I know why.

Why??

I forgot to put the brain in.

*wrinkles up her nose* Eddy, go get us a brain out of the jar on the counter please.

You keep brains in jars?

Actually, this isn't our lab. It's Sephy's.

And that explains everything! *goes to get a jarred brain*

Who's gonna put the brain in?

Yeah. Not even you know brain surgery, Ser.

*shrugs and smiles* How hard could it be?

*o.O*

Kidding...I got someone to do it for us.

*carrying in a brain in a jar* Who?

*The door opens. In steps a man wearing a lab coat and a surgeon's mask, so his face is hidden. Everyone but Serenity looks frightened.*

W...who's that...?

*smiles at the masked man* Aw, cut it out! You're scaring them!

Sorry. *he takes off the mask, to reveal none other than...*

VINCENT??!!

Yuppers. *grabs Vincent's arm* I asked him if he'd help, and he said he'd put the brain in for us.

*shrugs* I get to operate on someone that looks like Sephiroth. How could I refuse. Besides, she asked so nicely.

*whispers to Serenity* He looks like a vampire...

*whispers back* So? So did Setzer when I first met him...

*taps the jar* Hellloooo...Guy holding a brain here...

I think what my brother means to say is: Can we get this over with?

Sure. *points to Edgar* What's-your-name. Fish that brain outta there and hand it to me.

*looks sick* You want me to __touch it?!

*rolls his eyes* No, I want you to move it with your mind.....Is that possible for you?

No.

Oh. Okay then. Just pull it out of the jar, and let's get to work.

*tries to get the brain out of the jar, but spills it. The brain bounces on the floor like a quarter-machine super ball.*

*Everyone scrambles around to catch it, running into each other, the lab supplies, walls, etc... Finally, Kirie catches the thing, and Vincent puts it in the creation.*

Now what??

*hands Sabin a pair of those electrical cords that you charge dead car batteries with* We zap him to life!

*attaches one of the clip things to the creature, and hands Vincent the other one* Put that on the little generator thing over there please.

*hooks the other side to the electrical generator and is immediately fried* AAAAAHHHH!!!!! *a charred Vincent walks over to Sabin* You..did..that..on..purpose..

*aloud* Why, whatever do you mean? *to Vincent* Stay away from my girlfriend, you vampire.

*stands behind a row of levers* Everybody get back! I'm juicin' it up!

*Everyone puts on their safety goggles*

*flips the generator on. The electricity surges through the cords into the Setzeroth creature. Kirie turns the generator off*

Did it work??

*The Setzeroth twitches. It sits up all Frakenstein-ish and looks at the group* Mama!!

*o.O!!!*

*bursts in through the door* What in the hell are you people doing in my lab??!! *looks at Vincent* And what's __he doing here?!

*enters the room half-asleep* What's wrong with you people? I'm tryin' to SLEEP here...

*turns to Sephiroth and Setzer* Mama!! Daddy!!

*O.O!!!* Daddy?!

*O.O!!!* Mama?!

*laughs nervously* Surprise.

We made a little something in your lab.

It's called a Setzeroth. Part Setzer, part Sephiroth.

And I believe it thinks you're it's dad, Setzer.

*chuckles* And it thinks Sephiroth's it's mother!

*jumps off the table and starts chasing Setzer and Sephiroth* MAMA!! DADDY!!!

What in the name of 7-Flush??!!

Mama, save me!!

*The Setzeroth chases Setz and Sephy out of the room, as the others laugh away*

  


  


**A Strange Creation**

**by Karuri-chan**

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**Disclaimer: I own nothing but this sad attempt at humor and Serenity. bluediamondwolf owns Kirie.**

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**Notes: This was a challenge on the FF message board, so it's somehow funny. And strange. Feel free to throw things at me if you hate it.**

  


  


[Enter onto a horror movie-esque scene. Serenity, Sabin, Edgar and Kirie, all dressed in white lab coats, are surrounding a human-looking figure under a cloth on a table.]

Sereity: IT'S ALIVE!! IT IS ALIIIIIIIIIVE!!!!!!!!!

Sabin: [pokes the limp figure] Uh, Serry...it doesn't look to alive to me...

Kirie: [shrugs] Maybe it's just...resting.

Edgar:What exactly is our purpose for this again?

Serenity: [groans] I __told you, Maca-Roni. I figure, if Sephy can make a weirdo, science-fair project of a mother, then __we can do it too. 

Kirie: Only we're doing something even better than raising parents from the dead.

Sabin: Which would be...?

[The two girls look at each other and smile]

Both: A SETZEROTH!!

Edgar: What the hell is a Setzeroth??

Kirie: It's a mix between Setzer and Sephiroth.

Serenity: Duh...

Sabin: Okay...so why isn't it moving?

Serenity: I think I know why.

Others: Why??

Serenity: [winces] I forgot to put the brain in.

Kirie: [wrinkles up her nose] Eddy, go get us a brain out of the jar on the counter please.

Sabin: You keep brains in jars?

Serenity: Actually, this isn't our lab. It's Sephy's.

Edgar: And that explains everything! [goes to get a jarred brain]

Kirie: Who's gonna put the brain in?

Sabin: Yeah. Not even you know brain surgery, Ser.

Serenity: [shrugs and smiles] How hard could it be?

Others: o.O!!!

Serenity: Kidding...I got someone to do it for us.

Edgar: [carrying in a brain in a jar] Who?

[The door opens. In steps a man wearing a lab coat and a surgeon's mask, so his face is hidden. Everyone but Serenity looks frightened.]

Kirie: W...who's that...?

Serenity: [smiles at the masked man] Aw, cut it out! You're scaring them!

Man: Sorry. [he takes off the mask, to reveal none other than...]

All (except Serry): VINCENT??!!

Serenity: Yuppers. [grabs Vincent's arm] I asked him if he'd help, and he said he'd put the brain in for us.

Vincent:[shrugs] I get to operate on someone that looks like Sephiroth. How could I refuse. Besides, she asked so nicely.

Kirie: [whispers to Serenity] He looks like a vampire...

Serenity:[whispers back] So? So did Setzer when I first met him...

Edgar: [taps the jar] Hellloooo...Guy holding a brain here...

Sabin: I think what my brother means to say is: Can we get this over with?

Vincent: Sure. [points to Edgar] What's-your-name. Fish that brain outta there and hand it to me.

Edgar: [looks sick] You want me to __touch it?!

Vincent: [rolls his eyes] No, I want you to move it with your mind.....Is that possible for you?

Edgar: No.

Vincent: Oh. Okay then. Just pull it out of the jar, and let's get to work.

[Edgar tries to get the brain out of the jar, but spills it. The brain bounces on the floor like a quarter-machine super ball. Everyone scrambles around to catch it, running into each other, the lab supplies, walls, etc... Finally, Kirie catches the thing, and Vincent puts it in the creation.]

Sabin: Now what??

Serenity: [hands Sabin a pair of those electrical cords that you charge dead car batteries with] We zap him to life!

Sabin: [attaches one of the clip things to the creature, and hands Vincent theother one] Put that on the little generator thing over there please.

Vincent: [hooks the other side to the electrical generator and is immediately fried] AAAAAHHHH!!!!! [a charred Vincent walks over to Sabin] You.. did.. that.. on.. purpose..

Sabin: [aloud] Why, whatever do you mean? [to Vincent] Stay away from my girlfriend, you vampire.

Kirie: [stands behind a row of levers] Everybody get back! I'm juicin' it up!

[Everyone puts on their safety goggles]

[She flips the generator on. The electricity surges through the cords into the Setzeroth creature. Kirie turns the generator off.]

Edgar: Did it work??

[The Setzeroth twitches. It sits up all Frakenstein-ish and looks at the group.] Mama!!

All: o.O!!!

Sephiroth: [bursts in through the door] What in the hell are you people doing in my lab??!! [looks at Vincent] And what's __he doing here?!

Setzer: [enters the room half-asleep] What's wrong with you people? I'm tryin' to SLEEP here...

Setzeroth: [turns to Sephiroth and Setzer] Mama!! Daddy!!

Setzer: O.O!!! Daddy?!

Sephiroth: O.O!!! Mama?!

Serenity: [laughs nervously] Surprise.

Kirie: We made a little something in your lab.

Sabin: It's called a Setzeroth. Part Setzer, part Sephiroth.

Edgar: And I believe it thinks you're it's dad, Setzer.

Vincent: [chuckles] And it thinks Sephiroth's it's mother!

Setzeroth: [jumps off the table and starts chasing Setzer and Sephiroth] MAMA!! DADDY!!!

Setzer: What in the name of 7-Flush??!!

Sephiroth: Mama, save me!!

[The Setzeroth chases Setz and Sephy out of the room, as the others laugh away.]

  


**A/N: This was stupid. Yet funny...**

  


  



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